And it begins…
Maybe it’s because I have a teensy bit of alcohol in me, but it’s finally starting to hit. Leaving tomorrow morning (technically today) and not seeing these people for a while, if not ever, really is going to suck.
I’ve made amazing friends this last semester. One that I’ve known for a while and just got closer to and one that has become one of my absolute best friends in a very short period of time. She is one of those people who deserves the absolute best out of life and even though I was a terrible friend and selfish for a while, I got exactly what I deserved and now she’s happy, which is exactly how it should be.
But then there’s all these friends that I’ll possibly never see again. And I just started to really get to know them recently. (Probably because of my stubbornness and anti-social thing and lack of emotions.) But still, I start to see more than ever that I could have learned so much from them. They could have been amazing friends, but I passed up the opportunity and now the moment is gone.
I’m not looking forward to going home, at all. Other than seeing my family, “home” isn’t where I want to be. I want to be around people more like me. People I aspire to learn from and grow with. That’s here, not back “home.” Other than my close family, what do I have at home? People without dreams and aspirations. People who won’t stop reminding me of my mistakes. People who blame me for something I had no control over. And most of all, a person who deserves the absolute best, and what he has is me. He deserves better. But I’m trying my best. After all, love is a decision, not a feeling, right? eh. whatever.
Point is: summer has begun. And while tonight was a great start to it, it was definitely bittersweet. So here’s to trying my best to not miss any more opportunities or take anything for granted. I gotta keep looking down and reminding myself that everything must be done with all your heart or not at all.
You know I’ve got this theory, there are two kinds of people in the world. There are lyric people and music people. You know, the lyrics people tend to be analytical. You know, all about the meaning of the song. They’re the ones you see with the CD insert out like 5 minutes after buying it, pouring over the lyrics, interpreting the hell out of everything. Um, then there’s the music people, like Brooke. Who could care less for the lyrics as long as its just got like a good beat and you could dance to it. I don’t know, sometimes it might be easier to be a music girl and not a lyric girl. But since I’m not, let me just say this. Sometimes things find you when you need them to find you, I believe that. And for me its usually song lyrics.
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| — | Peyton Sawyer (via allthingsoldandtragic) |
